So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
