Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
You don't have asthma, your pregnant
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
