STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
