weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize
