We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Randomize
