I wanna bring you to show and tell
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
i wish my penis had a tongue
she smelled like a LAN party
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
