i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Randomize
