do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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