She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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