Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(573): View more from Missouri

i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru

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(541): View more from Oregon

I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.

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(707): View more from California

last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.

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(310): View more from California

I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..

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(305): View more from Florida

I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"

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(650): View more from California

Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers

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(817): View more from Texas

getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.

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(636): View more from Missouri

Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work

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(646): View more from New York

So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.

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