i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
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