Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize