oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
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