what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
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