I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
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