im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
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