margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Randomize
