My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
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