he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
