wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Randomize
