If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
