you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Rumble strips road head = magical
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Randomize
