Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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