So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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