got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
The cops high fived after they tackled you
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
