Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
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