so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Randomize
