Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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