hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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