Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
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