Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
