she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Randomize
