Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
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