Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize
