can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
People in love make me want to vomit
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Randomize
