You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Randomize
