I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
