Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Randomize
