it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Randomize
