that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
I had to cum in my sink.
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