suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
