matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
