I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
