So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
