The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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