No awkward lesbian experiences without me
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
