Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(818): View more from California

Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.

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(440): View more from Ohio

It looked like if robin williams had a vagina

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.

(330): View more from Ohio

I don't know you.

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(847): View more from Illinois

my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.

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(732): View more from New Jersey

So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.

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(513): View more from Ohio

corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing

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(847): View more from Illinois

The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job

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(989): View more from Michigan

I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.

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(765): View more from Indiana

What happened to your back?

(260): View more from Indiana

Rug burn. My ass is even worse.

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