That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
There's a naked man in my car right now.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
