What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I need to wash the frat house off of me
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
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