i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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